ALL I WANT IS SOMEONE I CAN'T RESIST
MEL
Mel sat and stewed over her phone conversation with Taylor. She didn't understand it. She didn't understand how passive he could be and she didn't understand her own attitude--where was the desperation? The want? The need? Was it pregnancy hormones? Did she care anymore? Of course she did. She had to...
Jason had been so good to her. He always was and this time hadn't been any different. He had been respectful and he had been good to her. And he put her in her place. Constantly, he put her in her place and she allowed him to do so. She allowed it because she valued and respected his opinions and his feelings. Did she not respect and value Tay's? Is that why she constantly fought him? Was that why everything was a constant battle? If you loved someone, you were supposed to respect their opinions and feelings. Right? Wasn't that the way it was supposed to work?
Had Jason been right? Had he said a lot of things yesterday that he shouldn't have said? Maybe. But was he wrong about any of it? That was where Mel was having a hard time.
His speech about history made a lot of sense. Too much sense. And she'd dwelled on it quite a bit since he said it. But now she was more interested in the other things he'd said. He hadn't said anything she didn't already know. Except for the "marry me" part. That was new. Was he for real? Was it an actual marriage proposal or was it an act of desperation? Was he trying to make a point?
He had told her the only time he ever saw her happy was when she was with him. She couldn't help but to compare the two. And the more she dwelled on it, the more she realized he'd been right. She never shed a tear around Jason. And when she did, Taylor was always behind it in some, way, shape, or fashion. Other than that, when she was with Jason, she never stressed, she never worried, she never needed or wanted for anything. He was perfect company.
And he loved her. She knew he loved her. He was essentially the perfect man. He was tall, dark, and handsome. He was caring and generous and kind. He was loyal, faithful, dependable. And honest. So completely honest. And the sex? Good lord, the sex was amazing back in the day. How could she have possibly let a man like him go?
She hated having time to think. Thinking of Jason immediately made her feel guilty about Taylor. He still loved her, too. And she loved him. But it just didn't--it didn't feel the same anymore. Things had changed. Was it their relationship towards the end? Was it these past couple of months they'd spent apart? Were they getting time to clear their heads and truly reevaluate what their relationship had been--or hadn't been? Had they tried too hard?
Mel looked up and looked around, the September afternoon sun shining into the apartment. As she looked around at her surroundings, she scrunched her nose up. The apartment suddenly felt very stuffy. With the exception of the occasional errand here and there, Mel hadn't been out of the apartment since she'd left Hanson's tour. She had been content during that time to hole up and hide and feel sorry for herself. She'd been content to be a hermit.
She needed to get out.
Mel had found this gorgeous, white, Mexican peasant blouse last summer from a street vendor in the city. She didn't normally buy her clothes off of street vendors and, had this not been hand-stitched, it would have been an entirely different story. But this one was white with short sleeves and red, embroidered lines that sectioned off colorful embroidered flowers across the chest and stomach. The shirt hung down to her thighs and she paired it with dark blue skinny jeans and a pair of gold sandals.
Once dressed, with her face and her hair done, she looked in the mirror and let out a small gasp. She hadn't seen herself--her real self--in what seemed like ages. You tended to get used to day after day of looking in the mirror and seeing nothing but a haggard face with bags under your eyes and no color in your cheeks. For the first time in several months, she was Mel again.
Throwing some random foods in a basket, including more of the fruit Jason had cut up, she grabbed up a blanket and a throw pillow and headed out of the apartment. Tonight, the New York Philharmonic was playing in Central Park, an event that she used to love and hadn't seen in years. For the first time in a long time, she was excited about something.
The Philharmonic wouldn't take the stage for a couple more hours but Mel insisted on being there early to snag her favorite tree. Hundreds of people, debatably thousands, usually turned up for this event. It was a perfect family event. Bring your blankets and your chairs, chill out for a few hours, listen to good music. The perfect recipe for a leisurely evening.
Her favorite tree stood at the very, very back of the section of the park that the crowds gathered for the shows. It was a perfect tree, that seemed to have a trunk molded just for sitting under. The branches above hung over like a canopy to shield from the sun and it sat away from the crowd, but in it just enough to make you feel included.
Upon arriving in the park, she was elated to see that her tree stood unoccupied. Happily, she bounded over and set herself up, laying out her blanket and stuffing her pillow between herself and the tree so she could lean against it. She looked around and smiled. She had missed this so much. She really did love the city and the park and the people. And the Philharmonic. Oh, she was so excited for the concert to start she could barely sit still. It was funny, the things you didn't realize you took for granted until you realized you missed them.
And then she started to think. Jason would be so proud of her. For getting out of the bed, getting dressed, and coming out. He would definitely be proud. It was too bad he wasn't there...
Mel fished out her phone and called him. She felt guilty since he'd said he was gonna be busy and he had already spent a day and a half with her. But who cared, it was worth a shot.
She was slightly surprised when he answered. "Hey, gorgeous. You okay?"
Mel found herself smiling into the phone. "Yeah. I'm okay. Um, I didn't mean to interrupt whatever it is you're doing. I mean, I know you just saw me and all..."
"No, it's no problem. I'm just in a meeting. I needed the break anyway. What's up?"
"So, um, like I said, I know you said you're gonna be busy, but...well...I called to see if maybe you wanted to maybe do something? Later? Like, outside the apartment?"
"Outside the apartment, huh?" Then she heard the smile in his voice. "Why, Melody Banks, are you asking me out?"
Mel's eyes widened. She hadn't thought about it that way. "Um--"
"It was a joke, hon."
"Well--but what if I am?"
"What if you're what?"
"Asking you out. What if I'm asking you out?"
There was a pause before he responded. "Um--uh, out as in...a date?"
She smiled shyly into the phone. "Yeah. Why not?"
"Uh, uh, well, what did you have in mind?"
"Do you have time?"
"Yeah, of course I have time. Where do you wanna go?"
She looked around her. "Well, I'm already here...I got here early to get a good spot...oh, the park. Central Park. Music in the park tonight."
"Music in the park?"
"Well, I mean, if that's not your speed we can reschedule or something..."
"No. No, that sounds perfect."
Mel found herself grinning, unable to control herself. "Um, okay. Great. Um, well the concert isn't for another couple of hours so you can take your time. You can call me when you get in the park and I'll direct you to where I am. You can't miss me."
She heard the smile in Jason's voice. "I'll be there before you know it."
Hanging up the phone, she bit her lip and smiled. Was she doing this right? Was she doing the right thing?
Did it matter anymore?
---------------------------------------------------------
JASON
Attempting to collect himself, Jason walked back into the small office with the writers and producers he'd been meeting with. "Uh, looks like I gotta cut this meeting short, boys. I just got an offer I couldn't refuse."
The guy in the newsboy cap piped up, "How much is it? I can be negotiable."
Jason smiled as he packed up his paperwork. "It's not business."
"It's not business, huh? What the hell else is gonna make you bail on this meeting? This shit's important, man!"
"Look. The most beautiful woman in the world just called me and asked me out on a date. I'm not about to say no."
"Well, when Victoria's Secret comes knocking, I guess..."
Jason looked up from the papers he put away. "She's not a model."
One of the writers started laughing. "Oh shit! Are you blushing? Hey, guys, look at that! Jason's blushing!"
"Can it, guys. We can reschedule for tomorrow sometime, okay?"
"Hey, you gonna be in commission tomorrow?" the guy in the newsboy cap asked.
The rest of the guys howled in laughter.
"It's not like that," Jason responded.
"Ooooh, this one must be special!" one of the other guys chided.
"Calling it a day," Jason said as he headed for the office door. "Call me about tomorrow."
Jason's hotel was merely blocks from the office and the walk felt like an eternity. Hours earlier, just after he'd left Mel's, he'd headed straight to New Jersey to check out of that hotel and came right back into the city to check into one downtown. There was no way he was going to put that much distance between the two of them now.
After feverishly stressing about which shirt to wear (which he never did), he finally decided on a gray, long-sleeved Henley tee that he left unbuttoned at the top--he knew what Mel liked. Then he spent the next half hour arguing with the cab driver about which section of the park that the orchestra was playing in. He swore, all the cab drivers in this city were out to get him. Every last one of them.
Pushing up his sleeves and tucking his hands in his pockets, Jason sauntered leisurely through the park, looking at trees and checking out the people. He had a mission, but he didn't want to look like he was on one. He tried the ignore the beating of his heart and the sweat on his palms as best as he could, but the moment he spotted her, he was instantly weak in the knees.
He hadn't called her like he said he was going to. Sometimes he got high on anticipation and this was one of those times. She'd said she would be easy to find and she hadn't been kidding. He couldn't help but to stop a few trees away and look at her for a moment. She looked so beautiful sitting against the tree, lost in whatever book she was reading. One by one, she would reach in the basket next to her and pop something into her mouth. She sat with her legs together and her knees up and he almost didn't want to disturb her, except that he was dying to be close to her.
He took a couple of steps and stopped again to watch what was unfolding next. A golden retriever walked up to her blanket and started sniffing around her basket. The dog was then followed by a man, who Mel barely noticed for standing up to cuddle the dog. Jason had to smile. The scene was adorable. The dog jumped up on Mel as she took its face in her hands and dodged its tongue. Then she looked up and started talking to the man. And the man looked at her like--he knew that look. Typical. Using the dog to pick up women. That asshole was trying to pick her up. Not that Jason was the jealous type, but--nobody and nothing was going to ruin this evening for him.
He saw her shake her head and shrug her shoulders and the man leashed his dog and walked away. He couldn't help but smile again as she settled back into her original position. She didn't hear him walk up and he squatted down by the blanket and said, "Now, what's a beautiful woman like you doing out here on a night like his all by herself?"
Turning to look at him, a huge smile flashed across Mel's face that made Jason's heart melt. As she cleared a few things from the space next to her, she answered, "Waiting for a tall, sexy Hawaiian to come and claim the space beside her."
"Well. I guess I'll be on my way, then," he joked.
Mel giggled and pulled him by his wrist. "Just sit down, silly!"
Sitting next to her on the blanket, he couldn't help stealing a glance over at her again. She had taken her shoes off. And she'd painted her toenails. He had to grin at her tiny feet. "You know, I'm impressed," he said.
She looked up at him. "At what?"
"At--well, at all this. I'm proud of you for getting out and coming out here."
"Oh." She smiled shyly. "Thank you. Me, too. Oh. Here." She reached around and moved the basket in between them. "Help yourself. It's nothing heavy, just some things to munch on."
As they rummaged and munched on fruits and cheeses, Mel asked Jason, "So what do you have going on in the city, anyway?"
"Um, nothing set in stone yet. Just meeting with some writers and producers about working on an independent film or two. Very, very early stages of development."
Mel nodded her head. "Interesting...is it weird? Not acting?"
Jason sighed. "I, uh, I made a couple of impulse decisions in that time. I'll definitely do more acting. Not sure when. I mean, I still have offers coming and stuff."
"You're just gonna play it by ear and do whatever you want."
He smiled and nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess so."
"What does that do for your stress level?"
"I'm not really sure yet. Scared to death and exhilarated all wrapped up into one."
Mel narrowed her eyes at him and smiled. "You? Scared? Jason Kamealoha isn't scared of anything."
He side-glanced at her and raised an eyebrow. "You'd be surprised."
"Hm," she responded, popping a grape into her mouth.
An hour later, when the afternoon sun had begun to go down and a golden glow settled over the park, Jason found his back up against the tree and Mel sat next to him, her knees curled up to her chest with her arms crossed over them and her chin resting on her arms as she watched the orchestra play. They hadn't done too much talking. Not as much as he'd liked, but it didn't really matter. Just being there next to her was all he needed to be happy.
Unfortunately, classical music wasn't his style. So he let his mind wander as it played, sometimes to places he shouldn't dare let it go. Another half an hour passed when he stole another look over at Mel. She still sat in the same position, legs curled up, chin on her arms, gazing intently toward the stage that sat so far away. He reached over and let the back of his hand brush the bare skin on her forearm. "Hey," he said gently. "You okay?"
Sitting up, she turned around and smiled. "I love the orchestra."
As she turned back around to watch the concert, a gust of wind blew over the park. Mel didn't act as if it phased her, but it was a big enough gust of wind for Jason, and a few people around them, to notice. He looked up at the sky as the dusk was just turning to night and he asked Mel, "Is it supposed to storm tonight?"
She simply shrugged. "I don't know."
Noticing the chill in the breeze, he looked over at Mel at her bare arms. "Come here," he said softly. She glanced over at him and wordlessly scooted over and let him pull her next to him, wrapping an arm around her and briskly rubbing her arm.
She giggled. "It was a gust of wind, it's not freezing out here."
Noticing the comment was an obvious defense mechanism against his holding her, he opted to ignore her and instead said quietly in her ear, "Tell me what you love about the orchestra."
She sighed and let her head fall back against his shoulder. "I don't know how to explain it. It's more than just listening. You feel it. When you allow yourself to open up and invite it in, it's like--it's like it runs through your veins...through your entire body. Here, take a deep breath and close your eyes."
"What?"
She turned around and looked at him and smiled. "Just do it. Take a long, deep breath, and close your eyes. And then just lose yourself."
Doing as he was told, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes, resting his head against the tree. After a moment, he felt her pick up his hand. She turned it palm up and opened his hand. "Here," she said quietly. "Open your hand like you're inviting it in." And then gently, ever so gently, she let her fingers trail slowly from the tips of his fingers, down his wrist, and up his forearm. "And allow it to run through your veins, just like that."
And then, causing him to gasp in a breath from the inside, she interlaced her fingers with his tightly and rested their hands on his leg with no obvious intention of letting go.
As the concert wore on, he began to observe people starting to leave. Seeming like a good idea, he said to Mel, "You know, if we don't leave now, it's going to be a madhouse getting out of here."
She sat up and looked at him. "But the finale's the best part. And sometimes there are fireworks."
He narrowed his eyes at her. "Just sometimes?"
She stared up into his eyes, obvious that she understood his double entendre. And then, slowly but surely, she turned her body toward him. Her hand left his and lightly pressed against his chest. And then, hesitantly, she leaned up and she kissed him, her lips soft against his.
His heart pounded as he struggled to keep it together. Gently, she deepened the kiss, allowing her tongue to find its way inside his mouth and he tasted the sweet flavor of fruit as she kissed him. Her hand left his chest and reached up for his cheek, pulling him closer to her as she kissed him even deeper and his arm dropped to her waist in a futile attempt to pull her closer, cursing the position they were seated in for making that nearly impossible.
Finally realizing that they had to be near the end of the song, and the rockets had yet to produce their red glare in the sky above them, he broke the kiss long enough to whisper, "I thought you said there'd be fireworks?"
She looked into his eyes and whispered, "There are."
With that, he reached over and hooked an arm around her waist, pulling her side-saddle into his lap and swept her hair out of her face with both hands as he kissed her again, feeling her body pressed against his, and he kissed her passionately, holding her tightly, until the last note was played.
As promised, the sounds of explosions filled the sky as the ground lit up around them from the fireworks that burst above them. Both of them ignoring the sights and sounds, Mel broke their kiss and looked into his eyes. "Come home with me tonight."
Jason was floored and more than excited at the formal invitation. "Um, are you sure?"
She nodded. "I mean, if you want to..."
"Ask me again."
"Will you come home with me tonight?"
He smiled at her. "I thought you'd never ask."
She smiled back. "So, uh, you wanna get out of here?"
"More than anything."
------------------
Jason helped Mel pick up her things and he wondered how in the hell she had hauled it there alone. Each carrying their own bundles, they started down the streets of New York. "You remember the last time we walked down these streets together?" Mel asked. "In that freak snowstorm?"
"Damn, I know," Jason agreed. "What the hell was that, anyway?"
She shrugged. "Who knows? But you wanna know a secret?"
"What?"
"I really liked being stuck in the snow with you. It was fun."
Jason smiled into the dark, amused. "Oh, really?"
"You make everything fun."
Narrowing his eyes at the entire night being too good to be true, he finally asked her, "What's going on here? What is all this?"
"All what?"
"You know."
"I thought we weren't over-analyzing? Living for the now and all that stuff."
"Are you living for the now?"
"Yes. Is that a problem?"
Jason walked in silence for a moment in thought before he answered her. "Nope. Not at all."
After catching a cab and making their way up to her condo, he noticed the shaking of her hands as she tried to unlock her door. On the outside, she was confident and collected--on the inside she was just as scared to death as he was. Except his was the best kind of scared there was. He hoped hers was, too.
Finally, she gave up in frustration. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I don't know what's going on right now--"
"Hey. Honey, look at me," he said gently as she turned around. "We don't have to do this. If you're not ready--"
"I want you to stay. I really do."
"Okay," he said simply, choosing not to argue. The he lifted the keys from her hand. "Here, let me do this."
He let them in the apartment and they put down the things they had in their hands. "Um, I just need to take care of a thing or two. This is the longest I've been out since--well, it'll be just a minute."
"It's okay," he reassured her. "It's just me. Just me. I promise."
Smiling shyly at him, she carried the basket into the kitchen and he couldn't help but peek in on her and watch as she carefully removed the contents and repackaged them and put them back in their rightful locations. She was so delicate and thorough, the way she did it. Then he watched her not just drink, but savor, half a bottle of water until she looked like she had calmed down some.
Turning around, she found him leaning in the doorway of the kitchen as he watched her, and he was almost unaware that he'd been standing there, much less being so obvious. Instead of being upset like she normally might, she simply went to walk past him, catching his hand as she went, and led him into the guest bedroom where she'd been sleeping.
She felt the need to close the door behind them and he wasn't sure why, though if he had to guess, it was to make it more intimate for them. As if a closed door would ultimately bring them closer together. He stood at the edge of the bed and watched her as she pulled her sandals off of her feet before she carefully approached him. Standing in front of him, she let her hand gently trail up his shirt and he sucked in a breath at her first delicate touch. Suddenly catching her hand underneath the material, he asked her one more time, "Are you sure you're ready for this?"
She gazed into his eyes and whispered, "I haven't touched you in so long." And then, taking both of her hands, she lifted his shirt and he helped her pull it over his head.
He looked down and watched her silently as she ran her hands slowly over his chest and his stomach, her eyes and her fingers drinking him all in. She let her hands run up his chest, up his neck, and then slowly back down. Stopping in the middle, she stepped closer to him and pressed her lips against his sternum, the first place she could reach to kiss him and he sucked in a breath at her soft lips on his skin.
She looked down, resting her forehead against his body and began to unbutton his jeans. Thumbing the seam around his waist, she pulled downward and he helped work his jeans to the floor, leaving him in his underwear. As he stepped out of them, he narrowed his eyes in curiosity as Mel stepped onto the bed and stood there behind him. Sliding her hands around his body and over his chest, she said softly in his ear, in a voice that came straight from her throat, "I dreamed about you."
Turning his head to the side, he responded over his shoulder, "Is that so?"
Grazing her nails up his arms and over his shoulders, she breathed, "I dreamed about you SO many times."
He felt her lips on the back of his neck and chills ran rampant through his body. Below his waist he was rock hard and dying of anticipation. "What happened in these dreams?"
"Unspeakable things," she hissed.
He took in a breath at her answer as he felt her moving behind him. He glanced down as her jeans dropped to the floor beside him. Feeling her delicate hands on his shoulders, she gently beared down on them, signifying her command for him to sit. Slowly, he sat on the edge of the bed and, from behind him, he felt her squatting, her knees bent at either side of his body. Unable to keep his hands off of her legs, he hooked his arms around them, excited by her soft skin on his. Suddenly, he felt her nails in his scalp as she scratched upward through his hair and he closed his eyes and let out a moan at the pleasure he got from it. "Do you remember that last benefit I held here in New York," she whispered seductively into his ear as her fingers slowly tousled his hair. "The one for the first responders? I dreamed that you trapped me in the coat closet, sat me on top of a cabinet--" Her arm came over his shoulder and her nails grazed down his neck. "Your head between my legs. God, it felt so good."
"I can make that a reality," he responded quietly, locking her legs tighter against him.
"I know you can. And then I dreamed of you right here in this apartment, in my bed." She tugged his head back by his hair. "I touched myself after that one. Even when I'm not with you, you turn me on."
"What about now?"
"It's all I can do just to sit here and tell you my naughty secrets."
A nearly inaudible groan escaped his throat. "How many more were there?"
"Countless. So, so many more."
"Do you want me as much as I want you?"
"Worse."
Unable to take the teasing any longer, he turned around on the bed and grabbed her by the waist, slinging her around to straddle his lap and realizing the force he'd used, remembering she was pregnant, his eyes widened and he blurted, "I'm so sorry."
She smiled. "I've missed this."
"I've missed you." Looking up into her eyes, he anxiously pulled her shirt over her head and shoved her bra straps downward as he kissed her shoulder. Reaching behind her, she unfastened her bra and let it slide off her arms. He was instantly turned on at the way her breasts had seemingly doubled in size and he caught her looking back at him nervously as she inconspicuously tried to hide them with her arms, obviously growing self-conscious about her recent body changes.
She had never hidden from him before and he felt bad for her for feeling the way she did. If only she could see what he saw... He wrapped his arms around her and smiled at her, saying, "You're so beautiful."
This seemed to put her at ease and he kissed her, letting his hands explore her body. Out of the blue, her hand reached down between them and wrapped around him through his underwear and her demeanor instantly changed. Looking up in her eyes, he saw a savage determination in them that told him she wasn't willing to wait much longer. As if on cue, she pushed him back onto the bed and climbed over top of him, letting her hand run down the length of his torso before pulling downward at the seam of his underwear. Helping her remove them, he had barely laid back down before she was already sliding herself on top of him and he moaned when he felt himself inside her.
She wasted no time finding her rhythm on him and he couldn't stop watching her face as she enjoyed herself. As she breathed and she moaned, he found himself wanting more of her and whispered to her. "Slow down, baby. Slow down."
Slowing down, she looked at him, desperation in her eyes. "I don't want to. I want YOU."
Searching her eyes for a moment, he sat up and braced his arm against her back as he turned her over and laid her out across the bed. Never skipping a beat, he entered her a second time, sweeping hair back from her face with both hands as he thrust himself into her. The more she arched her back, the faster he went, and his breathing became more shallow and more staggered the better it felt. When she threw her head back onto the bed, he took her neck in his mouth, growling into her skin as he felt himself nearing the end. "Jason," she whimpered at him, finally. "Jason, yes! Don't stop! Please don't stop! Fuck, that feels so good!" Her words staggered between her breathing and her moaning and the more she talked the better he liked it.
When he felt her body start to shake, he pinned her to the bed with his own body, locking one of her legs against his side. Feeling her convulse underneath him, so tight against him as her voice expressed her release in his ear, was enough to send him over the edge just moments after she'd finished. As he caught his breath, he kissed her neck and her lips until he collapsed onto the bed and pulled her close to him. "Holy shit," he smiled breathlessly. "Two years was way too long."
Suddenly she darted off the bed, muttering a quick "I'm sorry" and flew out of the bedroom. Completely puzzled, he sat up on the bed just in time to hear the slam of the door in the master bathroom on the other end of the apartment. As much as Jason wanted to bask in the afterglow of the amazing sex he'd just had with the woman he loved, he decided once and for all that, while she was out of commission, he was going to educate himself. Slipping his underwear back on, he scooped his jeans off the floor and fished his cell phone out of his pocket. Turning down the bed, he settled himself in and did a quick search for pregnancy facts.
He'd never been with a woman who was pregnant, much less had sex with one. And back home in Hawaii, when he knew aunts and cousins who were pregnant, he'd been too young to care. A quick search and a couple short paragraphs told him everything he needed to understand for the time being. First trimester--hormones, sickness, weird cravings, libido changes and increased sensitivity to the genitals--he'd picked out and retained that last part on his own. And he had just witnessed all of this over the past two days. Damn, it had to suck being a woman. But he'd hit the Cliff's notes, he was somewhat educated, and that was good enough for him for the time being.
Just over half an hour later, Mel appeared in the doorway, her hair wet and sporting an over-sized night shirt. She stood there and looked at him regretfully. "This isn't me."
Raising his head from the pillow, he looked over at her. "What isn't you?"
"This whole--pregnancy thing."
He smirked at her and turned her side of the bed down. "Come here, Mama."
Mel climbed into the bed and settled herself under the covers. Holding his arm open for her, she lay on her back against his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around, resting his hand against her stomach. Her left hand covered his and she reached over and took his right hand with hers. "What happened?" he asked her.
Mel scoffed at the ceiling. "What happens in that bathroom, stays in that bathroom. We do not need to go into detail with it."
"That bad, huh?"
"Like I said, I'm not--I don't DO pregnancy."
"I think you're adorable."
"What? I don't even look any different."
"Ah, I dunno. I can see little changes here and there."
"Please. You just like my boobs. I saw you when my bra came off."
He felt himself shrug. "Well, they ARE nice. But I liked them before, too."
"They're only gonna get bigger, you know."
"See, it's already getting better."
She elbowed him lightly in the ribs. "Yeah, except there will be stretch marks, and I'm gonna lactate all over the place and by that time size isn't even gonna matter, you're just gonna be grossed out."
"You say that like I'm gonna be around for this pregnancy," he said quietly.
She lifted his hand and mindlessly traced the lines in his palm with her finger. "I think it's gonna be a boy."
He turned his head and looked down at her. "You think?"
"Yeah. I just have a feeling. It'll be a boy."
"You wanna place bets?"
"His last name will be Hanson."
"I know."
"I'll have to deal with Taylor for at least the next eighteen years."
At that, Jason close his hand over hers and let them rest against him. "What are you saying? Are you not getting back together with him?"
She didn't respond.
"Have you even told him you're pregnant yet?"
Mel shook her head against his chest.
"Mel--I'm not trying to be a bastard or tell you how to run your life, but you're gonna have to tell him soon. It'll only be a couple more months before you start to show and pictures are gonna surface and--well, what are you gonna do then?"
She changed the subject again. "How much longer will you be in New York?"
Jason sighed as he thought about it. "Um, I was supposed to leave in a couple of days."
"Was?"
"Yeah. Was. But I'm gonna stay for as long as you want me to."
"Jason--I can't keep you from your work like that."
"I'm not doing anything that can't be postponed. I promise, I'm going to be here until you decide you don't need me anymore."
"I made my doctor's appointment. For next week. Here in New York. The same one I saw the first time."
"Do you want me to go with you?"
"Um--if you want. I mean, I know it's not your baby and you're not obligated to--"
"Stop talking like that."
"But I'd like you to be there. You know, for moral support. If it's not too--"
"I'll be there."
"Okay," she answered quietly.
"But I do have meetings for the next couple of days. They'll probably run late because they're reschedules, so I'll probably go back to my hotel so I don't bother you. Okay?"
Against his shoulder, Mel nodded. Suddenly, Jason felt awful and he didn't know why. Had he hurt her? Was he having doubts himself that even after tonight, she could still go back to Taylor? Of course there was a chance--a very likely one. He couldn't have been dumb enough to think she would actually choose him this time. Was he merely a victim of pregnancy hormones tonight? He had no way of knowing.
Still, turning over on his side, he turned her face toward his. "Mel. I'm yours. Okay? A hundred percent. Always remember that."
Wordlessly, she reached up and pulled his face down toward her by the back of his head. As she kissed him, he melted into her completely once again.
MEL
Mel sat and stewed over her phone conversation with Taylor. She didn't understand it. She didn't understand how passive he could be and she didn't understand her own attitude--where was the desperation? The want? The need? Was it pregnancy hormones? Did she care anymore? Of course she did. She had to...
Jason had been so good to her. He always was and this time hadn't been any different. He had been respectful and he had been good to her. And he put her in her place. Constantly, he put her in her place and she allowed him to do so. She allowed it because she valued and respected his opinions and his feelings. Did she not respect and value Tay's? Is that why she constantly fought him? Was that why everything was a constant battle? If you loved someone, you were supposed to respect their opinions and feelings. Right? Wasn't that the way it was supposed to work?
Had Jason been right? Had he said a lot of things yesterday that he shouldn't have said? Maybe. But was he wrong about any of it? That was where Mel was having a hard time.
His speech about history made a lot of sense. Too much sense. And she'd dwelled on it quite a bit since he said it. But now she was more interested in the other things he'd said. He hadn't said anything she didn't already know. Except for the "marry me" part. That was new. Was he for real? Was it an actual marriage proposal or was it an act of desperation? Was he trying to make a point?
He had told her the only time he ever saw her happy was when she was with him. She couldn't help but to compare the two. And the more she dwelled on it, the more she realized he'd been right. She never shed a tear around Jason. And when she did, Taylor was always behind it in some, way, shape, or fashion. Other than that, when she was with Jason, she never stressed, she never worried, she never needed or wanted for anything. He was perfect company.
And he loved her. She knew he loved her. He was essentially the perfect man. He was tall, dark, and handsome. He was caring and generous and kind. He was loyal, faithful, dependable. And honest. So completely honest. And the sex? Good lord, the sex was amazing back in the day. How could she have possibly let a man like him go?
She hated having time to think. Thinking of Jason immediately made her feel guilty about Taylor. He still loved her, too. And she loved him. But it just didn't--it didn't feel the same anymore. Things had changed. Was it their relationship towards the end? Was it these past couple of months they'd spent apart? Were they getting time to clear their heads and truly reevaluate what their relationship had been--or hadn't been? Had they tried too hard?
Mel looked up and looked around, the September afternoon sun shining into the apartment. As she looked around at her surroundings, she scrunched her nose up. The apartment suddenly felt very stuffy. With the exception of the occasional errand here and there, Mel hadn't been out of the apartment since she'd left Hanson's tour. She had been content during that time to hole up and hide and feel sorry for herself. She'd been content to be a hermit.
She needed to get out.
Mel had found this gorgeous, white, Mexican peasant blouse last summer from a street vendor in the city. She didn't normally buy her clothes off of street vendors and, had this not been hand-stitched, it would have been an entirely different story. But this one was white with short sleeves and red, embroidered lines that sectioned off colorful embroidered flowers across the chest and stomach. The shirt hung down to her thighs and she paired it with dark blue skinny jeans and a pair of gold sandals.
Once dressed, with her face and her hair done, she looked in the mirror and let out a small gasp. She hadn't seen herself--her real self--in what seemed like ages. You tended to get used to day after day of looking in the mirror and seeing nothing but a haggard face with bags under your eyes and no color in your cheeks. For the first time in several months, she was Mel again.
Throwing some random foods in a basket, including more of the fruit Jason had cut up, she grabbed up a blanket and a throw pillow and headed out of the apartment. Tonight, the New York Philharmonic was playing in Central Park, an event that she used to love and hadn't seen in years. For the first time in a long time, she was excited about something.
The Philharmonic wouldn't take the stage for a couple more hours but Mel insisted on being there early to snag her favorite tree. Hundreds of people, debatably thousands, usually turned up for this event. It was a perfect family event. Bring your blankets and your chairs, chill out for a few hours, listen to good music. The perfect recipe for a leisurely evening.
Her favorite tree stood at the very, very back of the section of the park that the crowds gathered for the shows. It was a perfect tree, that seemed to have a trunk molded just for sitting under. The branches above hung over like a canopy to shield from the sun and it sat away from the crowd, but in it just enough to make you feel included.
Upon arriving in the park, she was elated to see that her tree stood unoccupied. Happily, she bounded over and set herself up, laying out her blanket and stuffing her pillow between herself and the tree so she could lean against it. She looked around and smiled. She had missed this so much. She really did love the city and the park and the people. And the Philharmonic. Oh, she was so excited for the concert to start she could barely sit still. It was funny, the things you didn't realize you took for granted until you realized you missed them.
And then she started to think. Jason would be so proud of her. For getting out of the bed, getting dressed, and coming out. He would definitely be proud. It was too bad he wasn't there...
Mel fished out her phone and called him. She felt guilty since he'd said he was gonna be busy and he had already spent a day and a half with her. But who cared, it was worth a shot.
She was slightly surprised when he answered. "Hey, gorgeous. You okay?"
Mel found herself smiling into the phone. "Yeah. I'm okay. Um, I didn't mean to interrupt whatever it is you're doing. I mean, I know you just saw me and all..."
"No, it's no problem. I'm just in a meeting. I needed the break anyway. What's up?"
"So, um, like I said, I know you said you're gonna be busy, but...well...I called to see if maybe you wanted to maybe do something? Later? Like, outside the apartment?"
"Outside the apartment, huh?" Then she heard the smile in his voice. "Why, Melody Banks, are you asking me out?"
Mel's eyes widened. She hadn't thought about it that way. "Um--"
"It was a joke, hon."
"Well--but what if I am?"
"What if you're what?"
"Asking you out. What if I'm asking you out?"
There was a pause before he responded. "Um--uh, out as in...a date?"
She smiled shyly into the phone. "Yeah. Why not?"
"Uh, uh, well, what did you have in mind?"
"Do you have time?"
"Yeah, of course I have time. Where do you wanna go?"
She looked around her. "Well, I'm already here...I got here early to get a good spot...oh, the park. Central Park. Music in the park tonight."
"Music in the park?"
"Well, I mean, if that's not your speed we can reschedule or something..."
"No. No, that sounds perfect."
Mel found herself grinning, unable to control herself. "Um, okay. Great. Um, well the concert isn't for another couple of hours so you can take your time. You can call me when you get in the park and I'll direct you to where I am. You can't miss me."
She heard the smile in Jason's voice. "I'll be there before you know it."
Hanging up the phone, she bit her lip and smiled. Was she doing this right? Was she doing the right thing?
Did it matter anymore?
---------------------------------------------------------
JASON
Attempting to collect himself, Jason walked back into the small office with the writers and producers he'd been meeting with. "Uh, looks like I gotta cut this meeting short, boys. I just got an offer I couldn't refuse."
The guy in the newsboy cap piped up, "How much is it? I can be negotiable."
Jason smiled as he packed up his paperwork. "It's not business."
"It's not business, huh? What the hell else is gonna make you bail on this meeting? This shit's important, man!"
"Look. The most beautiful woman in the world just called me and asked me out on a date. I'm not about to say no."
"Well, when Victoria's Secret comes knocking, I guess..."
Jason looked up from the papers he put away. "She's not a model."
One of the writers started laughing. "Oh shit! Are you blushing? Hey, guys, look at that! Jason's blushing!"
"Can it, guys. We can reschedule for tomorrow sometime, okay?"
"Hey, you gonna be in commission tomorrow?" the guy in the newsboy cap asked.
The rest of the guys howled in laughter.
"It's not like that," Jason responded.
"Ooooh, this one must be special!" one of the other guys chided.
"Calling it a day," Jason said as he headed for the office door. "Call me about tomorrow."
Jason's hotel was merely blocks from the office and the walk felt like an eternity. Hours earlier, just after he'd left Mel's, he'd headed straight to New Jersey to check out of that hotel and came right back into the city to check into one downtown. There was no way he was going to put that much distance between the two of them now.
After feverishly stressing about which shirt to wear (which he never did), he finally decided on a gray, long-sleeved Henley tee that he left unbuttoned at the top--he knew what Mel liked. Then he spent the next half hour arguing with the cab driver about which section of the park that the orchestra was playing in. He swore, all the cab drivers in this city were out to get him. Every last one of them.
Pushing up his sleeves and tucking his hands in his pockets, Jason sauntered leisurely through the park, looking at trees and checking out the people. He had a mission, but he didn't want to look like he was on one. He tried the ignore the beating of his heart and the sweat on his palms as best as he could, but the moment he spotted her, he was instantly weak in the knees.
He hadn't called her like he said he was going to. Sometimes he got high on anticipation and this was one of those times. She'd said she would be easy to find and she hadn't been kidding. He couldn't help but to stop a few trees away and look at her for a moment. She looked so beautiful sitting against the tree, lost in whatever book she was reading. One by one, she would reach in the basket next to her and pop something into her mouth. She sat with her legs together and her knees up and he almost didn't want to disturb her, except that he was dying to be close to her.
He took a couple of steps and stopped again to watch what was unfolding next. A golden retriever walked up to her blanket and started sniffing around her basket. The dog was then followed by a man, who Mel barely noticed for standing up to cuddle the dog. Jason had to smile. The scene was adorable. The dog jumped up on Mel as she took its face in her hands and dodged its tongue. Then she looked up and started talking to the man. And the man looked at her like--he knew that look. Typical. Using the dog to pick up women. That asshole was trying to pick her up. Not that Jason was the jealous type, but--nobody and nothing was going to ruin this evening for him.
He saw her shake her head and shrug her shoulders and the man leashed his dog and walked away. He couldn't help but smile again as she settled back into her original position. She didn't hear him walk up and he squatted down by the blanket and said, "Now, what's a beautiful woman like you doing out here on a night like his all by herself?"
Turning to look at him, a huge smile flashed across Mel's face that made Jason's heart melt. As she cleared a few things from the space next to her, she answered, "Waiting for a tall, sexy Hawaiian to come and claim the space beside her."
"Well. I guess I'll be on my way, then," he joked.
Mel giggled and pulled him by his wrist. "Just sit down, silly!"
Sitting next to her on the blanket, he couldn't help stealing a glance over at her again. She had taken her shoes off. And she'd painted her toenails. He had to grin at her tiny feet. "You know, I'm impressed," he said.
She looked up at him. "At what?"
"At--well, at all this. I'm proud of you for getting out and coming out here."
"Oh." She smiled shyly. "Thank you. Me, too. Oh. Here." She reached around and moved the basket in between them. "Help yourself. It's nothing heavy, just some things to munch on."
As they rummaged and munched on fruits and cheeses, Mel asked Jason, "So what do you have going on in the city, anyway?"
"Um, nothing set in stone yet. Just meeting with some writers and producers about working on an independent film or two. Very, very early stages of development."
Mel nodded her head. "Interesting...is it weird? Not acting?"
Jason sighed. "I, uh, I made a couple of impulse decisions in that time. I'll definitely do more acting. Not sure when. I mean, I still have offers coming and stuff."
"You're just gonna play it by ear and do whatever you want."
He smiled and nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess so."
"What does that do for your stress level?"
"I'm not really sure yet. Scared to death and exhilarated all wrapped up into one."
Mel narrowed her eyes at him and smiled. "You? Scared? Jason Kamealoha isn't scared of anything."
He side-glanced at her and raised an eyebrow. "You'd be surprised."
"Hm," she responded, popping a grape into her mouth.
An hour later, when the afternoon sun had begun to go down and a golden glow settled over the park, Jason found his back up against the tree and Mel sat next to him, her knees curled up to her chest with her arms crossed over them and her chin resting on her arms as she watched the orchestra play. They hadn't done too much talking. Not as much as he'd liked, but it didn't really matter. Just being there next to her was all he needed to be happy.
Unfortunately, classical music wasn't his style. So he let his mind wander as it played, sometimes to places he shouldn't dare let it go. Another half an hour passed when he stole another look over at Mel. She still sat in the same position, legs curled up, chin on her arms, gazing intently toward the stage that sat so far away. He reached over and let the back of his hand brush the bare skin on her forearm. "Hey," he said gently. "You okay?"
Sitting up, she turned around and smiled. "I love the orchestra."
As she turned back around to watch the concert, a gust of wind blew over the park. Mel didn't act as if it phased her, but it was a big enough gust of wind for Jason, and a few people around them, to notice. He looked up at the sky as the dusk was just turning to night and he asked Mel, "Is it supposed to storm tonight?"
She simply shrugged. "I don't know."
Noticing the chill in the breeze, he looked over at Mel at her bare arms. "Come here," he said softly. She glanced over at him and wordlessly scooted over and let him pull her next to him, wrapping an arm around her and briskly rubbing her arm.
She giggled. "It was a gust of wind, it's not freezing out here."
Noticing the comment was an obvious defense mechanism against his holding her, he opted to ignore her and instead said quietly in her ear, "Tell me what you love about the orchestra."
She sighed and let her head fall back against his shoulder. "I don't know how to explain it. It's more than just listening. You feel it. When you allow yourself to open up and invite it in, it's like--it's like it runs through your veins...through your entire body. Here, take a deep breath and close your eyes."
"What?"
She turned around and looked at him and smiled. "Just do it. Take a long, deep breath, and close your eyes. And then just lose yourself."
Doing as he was told, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes, resting his head against the tree. After a moment, he felt her pick up his hand. She turned it palm up and opened his hand. "Here," she said quietly. "Open your hand like you're inviting it in." And then gently, ever so gently, she let her fingers trail slowly from the tips of his fingers, down his wrist, and up his forearm. "And allow it to run through your veins, just like that."
And then, causing him to gasp in a breath from the inside, she interlaced her fingers with his tightly and rested their hands on his leg with no obvious intention of letting go.
As the concert wore on, he began to observe people starting to leave. Seeming like a good idea, he said to Mel, "You know, if we don't leave now, it's going to be a madhouse getting out of here."
She sat up and looked at him. "But the finale's the best part. And sometimes there are fireworks."
He narrowed his eyes at her. "Just sometimes?"
She stared up into his eyes, obvious that she understood his double entendre. And then, slowly but surely, she turned her body toward him. Her hand left his and lightly pressed against his chest. And then, hesitantly, she leaned up and she kissed him, her lips soft against his.
His heart pounded as he struggled to keep it together. Gently, she deepened the kiss, allowing her tongue to find its way inside his mouth and he tasted the sweet flavor of fruit as she kissed him. Her hand left his chest and reached up for his cheek, pulling him closer to her as she kissed him even deeper and his arm dropped to her waist in a futile attempt to pull her closer, cursing the position they were seated in for making that nearly impossible.
Finally realizing that they had to be near the end of the song, and the rockets had yet to produce their red glare in the sky above them, he broke the kiss long enough to whisper, "I thought you said there'd be fireworks?"
She looked into his eyes and whispered, "There are."
With that, he reached over and hooked an arm around her waist, pulling her side-saddle into his lap and swept her hair out of her face with both hands as he kissed her again, feeling her body pressed against his, and he kissed her passionately, holding her tightly, until the last note was played.
As promised, the sounds of explosions filled the sky as the ground lit up around them from the fireworks that burst above them. Both of them ignoring the sights and sounds, Mel broke their kiss and looked into his eyes. "Come home with me tonight."
Jason was floored and more than excited at the formal invitation. "Um, are you sure?"
She nodded. "I mean, if you want to..."
"Ask me again."
"Will you come home with me tonight?"
He smiled at her. "I thought you'd never ask."
She smiled back. "So, uh, you wanna get out of here?"
"More than anything."
------------------
Jason helped Mel pick up her things and he wondered how in the hell she had hauled it there alone. Each carrying their own bundles, they started down the streets of New York. "You remember the last time we walked down these streets together?" Mel asked. "In that freak snowstorm?"
"Damn, I know," Jason agreed. "What the hell was that, anyway?"
She shrugged. "Who knows? But you wanna know a secret?"
"What?"
"I really liked being stuck in the snow with you. It was fun."
Jason smiled into the dark, amused. "Oh, really?"
"You make everything fun."
Narrowing his eyes at the entire night being too good to be true, he finally asked her, "What's going on here? What is all this?"
"All what?"
"You know."
"I thought we weren't over-analyzing? Living for the now and all that stuff."
"Are you living for the now?"
"Yes. Is that a problem?"
Jason walked in silence for a moment in thought before he answered her. "Nope. Not at all."
After catching a cab and making their way up to her condo, he noticed the shaking of her hands as she tried to unlock her door. On the outside, she was confident and collected--on the inside she was just as scared to death as he was. Except his was the best kind of scared there was. He hoped hers was, too.
Finally, she gave up in frustration. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I don't know what's going on right now--"
"Hey. Honey, look at me," he said gently as she turned around. "We don't have to do this. If you're not ready--"
"I want you to stay. I really do."
"Okay," he said simply, choosing not to argue. The he lifted the keys from her hand. "Here, let me do this."
He let them in the apartment and they put down the things they had in their hands. "Um, I just need to take care of a thing or two. This is the longest I've been out since--well, it'll be just a minute."
"It's okay," he reassured her. "It's just me. Just me. I promise."
Smiling shyly at him, she carried the basket into the kitchen and he couldn't help but peek in on her and watch as she carefully removed the contents and repackaged them and put them back in their rightful locations. She was so delicate and thorough, the way she did it. Then he watched her not just drink, but savor, half a bottle of water until she looked like she had calmed down some.
Turning around, she found him leaning in the doorway of the kitchen as he watched her, and he was almost unaware that he'd been standing there, much less being so obvious. Instead of being upset like she normally might, she simply went to walk past him, catching his hand as she went, and led him into the guest bedroom where she'd been sleeping.
She felt the need to close the door behind them and he wasn't sure why, though if he had to guess, it was to make it more intimate for them. As if a closed door would ultimately bring them closer together. He stood at the edge of the bed and watched her as she pulled her sandals off of her feet before she carefully approached him. Standing in front of him, she let her hand gently trail up his shirt and he sucked in a breath at her first delicate touch. Suddenly catching her hand underneath the material, he asked her one more time, "Are you sure you're ready for this?"
She gazed into his eyes and whispered, "I haven't touched you in so long." And then, taking both of her hands, she lifted his shirt and he helped her pull it over his head.
He looked down and watched her silently as she ran her hands slowly over his chest and his stomach, her eyes and her fingers drinking him all in. She let her hands run up his chest, up his neck, and then slowly back down. Stopping in the middle, she stepped closer to him and pressed her lips against his sternum, the first place she could reach to kiss him and he sucked in a breath at her soft lips on his skin.
She looked down, resting her forehead against his body and began to unbutton his jeans. Thumbing the seam around his waist, she pulled downward and he helped work his jeans to the floor, leaving him in his underwear. As he stepped out of them, he narrowed his eyes in curiosity as Mel stepped onto the bed and stood there behind him. Sliding her hands around his body and over his chest, she said softly in his ear, in a voice that came straight from her throat, "I dreamed about you."
Turning his head to the side, he responded over his shoulder, "Is that so?"
Grazing her nails up his arms and over his shoulders, she breathed, "I dreamed about you SO many times."
He felt her lips on the back of his neck and chills ran rampant through his body. Below his waist he was rock hard and dying of anticipation. "What happened in these dreams?"
"Unspeakable things," she hissed.
He took in a breath at her answer as he felt her moving behind him. He glanced down as her jeans dropped to the floor beside him. Feeling her delicate hands on his shoulders, she gently beared down on them, signifying her command for him to sit. Slowly, he sat on the edge of the bed and, from behind him, he felt her squatting, her knees bent at either side of his body. Unable to keep his hands off of her legs, he hooked his arms around them, excited by her soft skin on his. Suddenly, he felt her nails in his scalp as she scratched upward through his hair and he closed his eyes and let out a moan at the pleasure he got from it. "Do you remember that last benefit I held here in New York," she whispered seductively into his ear as her fingers slowly tousled his hair. "The one for the first responders? I dreamed that you trapped me in the coat closet, sat me on top of a cabinet--" Her arm came over his shoulder and her nails grazed down his neck. "Your head between my legs. God, it felt so good."
"I can make that a reality," he responded quietly, locking her legs tighter against him.
"I know you can. And then I dreamed of you right here in this apartment, in my bed." She tugged his head back by his hair. "I touched myself after that one. Even when I'm not with you, you turn me on."
"What about now?"
"It's all I can do just to sit here and tell you my naughty secrets."
A nearly inaudible groan escaped his throat. "How many more were there?"
"Countless. So, so many more."
"Do you want me as much as I want you?"
"Worse."
Unable to take the teasing any longer, he turned around on the bed and grabbed her by the waist, slinging her around to straddle his lap and realizing the force he'd used, remembering she was pregnant, his eyes widened and he blurted, "I'm so sorry."
She smiled. "I've missed this."
"I've missed you." Looking up into her eyes, he anxiously pulled her shirt over her head and shoved her bra straps downward as he kissed her shoulder. Reaching behind her, she unfastened her bra and let it slide off her arms. He was instantly turned on at the way her breasts had seemingly doubled in size and he caught her looking back at him nervously as she inconspicuously tried to hide them with her arms, obviously growing self-conscious about her recent body changes.
She had never hidden from him before and he felt bad for her for feeling the way she did. If only she could see what he saw... He wrapped his arms around her and smiled at her, saying, "You're so beautiful."
This seemed to put her at ease and he kissed her, letting his hands explore her body. Out of the blue, her hand reached down between them and wrapped around him through his underwear and her demeanor instantly changed. Looking up in her eyes, he saw a savage determination in them that told him she wasn't willing to wait much longer. As if on cue, she pushed him back onto the bed and climbed over top of him, letting her hand run down the length of his torso before pulling downward at the seam of his underwear. Helping her remove them, he had barely laid back down before she was already sliding herself on top of him and he moaned when he felt himself inside her.
She wasted no time finding her rhythm on him and he couldn't stop watching her face as she enjoyed herself. As she breathed and she moaned, he found himself wanting more of her and whispered to her. "Slow down, baby. Slow down."
Slowing down, she looked at him, desperation in her eyes. "I don't want to. I want YOU."
Searching her eyes for a moment, he sat up and braced his arm against her back as he turned her over and laid her out across the bed. Never skipping a beat, he entered her a second time, sweeping hair back from her face with both hands as he thrust himself into her. The more she arched her back, the faster he went, and his breathing became more shallow and more staggered the better it felt. When she threw her head back onto the bed, he took her neck in his mouth, growling into her skin as he felt himself nearing the end. "Jason," she whimpered at him, finally. "Jason, yes! Don't stop! Please don't stop! Fuck, that feels so good!" Her words staggered between her breathing and her moaning and the more she talked the better he liked it.
When he felt her body start to shake, he pinned her to the bed with his own body, locking one of her legs against his side. Feeling her convulse underneath him, so tight against him as her voice expressed her release in his ear, was enough to send him over the edge just moments after she'd finished. As he caught his breath, he kissed her neck and her lips until he collapsed onto the bed and pulled her close to him. "Holy shit," he smiled breathlessly. "Two years was way too long."
Suddenly she darted off the bed, muttering a quick "I'm sorry" and flew out of the bedroom. Completely puzzled, he sat up on the bed just in time to hear the slam of the door in the master bathroom on the other end of the apartment. As much as Jason wanted to bask in the afterglow of the amazing sex he'd just had with the woman he loved, he decided once and for all that, while she was out of commission, he was going to educate himself. Slipping his underwear back on, he scooped his jeans off the floor and fished his cell phone out of his pocket. Turning down the bed, he settled himself in and did a quick search for pregnancy facts.
He'd never been with a woman who was pregnant, much less had sex with one. And back home in Hawaii, when he knew aunts and cousins who were pregnant, he'd been too young to care. A quick search and a couple short paragraphs told him everything he needed to understand for the time being. First trimester--hormones, sickness, weird cravings, libido changes and increased sensitivity to the genitals--he'd picked out and retained that last part on his own. And he had just witnessed all of this over the past two days. Damn, it had to suck being a woman. But he'd hit the Cliff's notes, he was somewhat educated, and that was good enough for him for the time being.
Just over half an hour later, Mel appeared in the doorway, her hair wet and sporting an over-sized night shirt. She stood there and looked at him regretfully. "This isn't me."
Raising his head from the pillow, he looked over at her. "What isn't you?"
"This whole--pregnancy thing."
He smirked at her and turned her side of the bed down. "Come here, Mama."
Mel climbed into the bed and settled herself under the covers. Holding his arm open for her, she lay on her back against his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around, resting his hand against her stomach. Her left hand covered his and she reached over and took his right hand with hers. "What happened?" he asked her.
Mel scoffed at the ceiling. "What happens in that bathroom, stays in that bathroom. We do not need to go into detail with it."
"That bad, huh?"
"Like I said, I'm not--I don't DO pregnancy."
"I think you're adorable."
"What? I don't even look any different."
"Ah, I dunno. I can see little changes here and there."
"Please. You just like my boobs. I saw you when my bra came off."
He felt himself shrug. "Well, they ARE nice. But I liked them before, too."
"They're only gonna get bigger, you know."
"See, it's already getting better."
She elbowed him lightly in the ribs. "Yeah, except there will be stretch marks, and I'm gonna lactate all over the place and by that time size isn't even gonna matter, you're just gonna be grossed out."
"You say that like I'm gonna be around for this pregnancy," he said quietly.
She lifted his hand and mindlessly traced the lines in his palm with her finger. "I think it's gonna be a boy."
He turned his head and looked down at her. "You think?"
"Yeah. I just have a feeling. It'll be a boy."
"You wanna place bets?"
"His last name will be Hanson."
"I know."
"I'll have to deal with Taylor for at least the next eighteen years."
At that, Jason close his hand over hers and let them rest against him. "What are you saying? Are you not getting back together with him?"
She didn't respond.
"Have you even told him you're pregnant yet?"
Mel shook her head against his chest.
"Mel--I'm not trying to be a bastard or tell you how to run your life, but you're gonna have to tell him soon. It'll only be a couple more months before you start to show and pictures are gonna surface and--well, what are you gonna do then?"
She changed the subject again. "How much longer will you be in New York?"
Jason sighed as he thought about it. "Um, I was supposed to leave in a couple of days."
"Was?"
"Yeah. Was. But I'm gonna stay for as long as you want me to."
"Jason--I can't keep you from your work like that."
"I'm not doing anything that can't be postponed. I promise, I'm going to be here until you decide you don't need me anymore."
"I made my doctor's appointment. For next week. Here in New York. The same one I saw the first time."
"Do you want me to go with you?"
"Um--if you want. I mean, I know it's not your baby and you're not obligated to--"
"Stop talking like that."
"But I'd like you to be there. You know, for moral support. If it's not too--"
"I'll be there."
"Okay," she answered quietly.
"But I do have meetings for the next couple of days. They'll probably run late because they're reschedules, so I'll probably go back to my hotel so I don't bother you. Okay?"
Against his shoulder, Mel nodded. Suddenly, Jason felt awful and he didn't know why. Had he hurt her? Was he having doubts himself that even after tonight, she could still go back to Taylor? Of course there was a chance--a very likely one. He couldn't have been dumb enough to think she would actually choose him this time. Was he merely a victim of pregnancy hormones tonight? He had no way of knowing.
Still, turning over on his side, he turned her face toward his. "Mel. I'm yours. Okay? A hundred percent. Always remember that."
Wordlessly, she reached up and pulled his face down toward her by the back of his head. As she kissed him, he melted into her completely once again.