TELL ME TO STAY
MEL
Sunday.
Mel loved Sundays. Sunday was the one day of the week where Mel had space in her brain to think. Sunday got the house clean, the laundry done, and quality time with Taylor. Sundays were spent in pajamas, watching movies, and munching on crap.
This particular Sunday felt like work.
Mel and Tay both sat in the living room on opposite sofas, both with their feet propped on the same coffee table. They both sported their glasses and they both had their laptops in their laps, hard at work on their guest list for the wedding. Mel finally had to threaten Tay with the bodily harm of an instrument from the music room if he didn't buckle down and help her work on it. So here they sat, conducting the listing of guests as if it were a business meeting. Oddly enough, this was their norm.
"Wow, this is gonna end up being a bigger wedding than I thought," Tay said, shaking his head at his computer
screen. "I'm already up to 50 people and I'm still in my family!"
"Are you doing it by individuals or by families?"
He looked up at her in alarm. "Individuals?"
Mel shook her head as he feverishly went back to typing.
Meanwhile, Mel was growing increasingly frustrated with her own list. The plan had been for each of them to list who they wanted to invite and then compile their lists together. The problem was, Mel's list was next to nothing. She began to draw a frustrating blank when, as if reading her mind, Tay spoke up. "So how long
is your list getting over there?"
Mel looked up at him and winced. "Um, seven?"
Tay gaped at her. "Seven? You're kidding."
She shook her head. "My parents, the girls in the office, and Jason."
"Mel. That can't possibly be it."
"I don't really have anybody. I mean, I have an uncle and a couple of cousins, but I haven't talked to any of them since I married John. My uncle thought John was a putz and kinda caused a scene at the wedding. I'm not really close to them. And my mom doesn't have any siblings. My grandparents are all gone. And...that's it."
"I know I'm going out on a limb here, but have you considered Drew?"
She glowered at him. "Are you kidding?"
He raised his hands in defense. "Okay. Okay."
"I mean, I guess I could invite Bob Sheldon and his wife. And Willie from Irving Plaza. You think they'd wanna
come all the way to Texas just to watch me get married?"
"If they're important to you I don't see why they wouldn't."
"Well then that puts my grand total up to a whopping nine. Tay, the truth is, all the people who are important to me are important to you, too. They're probably all already on your list. This was a dumb idea. It's gonna be one hell of a lopsided wedding, I'll tell you that."
"See, that's why I don't believe in having a bride's side and a groom's side. I mean, I get the point, but it's kinda stupid. Don't go in there divided. We're creating a union. Why have a side? Why not everyone just sit together and unite our families as we unite ourselves? Doesn't that make more sense?"
Mel smiled at him, touched by his words. "I love you," she said softly.
He grinned at her, his eyes bright. "How much would you love me if I told you I wanted to handle the
invitations?"
She narrowed her eyes and sucked in a breath. "Now you're just turning me on."
Tay laughed and their moment was quickly over at the sound of Mel's phone ringing. She couldn't help but be a little surprised to see that it was Jason calling. She hadn't heard from him in weeks! "Well, surprise, surprise," she answered.
He chuckled on the other end. "Hey, gorgeous. What are you up to?"
"Tay and I are actually sitting here going over the guest list."
"When are you gonna ask me to be your maid of honor?"
"I don't know, what's your dress size?"
Jason laughed. "Not gonna happen."
"I'm sorry, then. Job requires a dress. Guess you're just not maid of honor material."
"Guess I'm not. So, listen, I was invited to a party..."
"Last time a man started a conversation with that I ended up at a weird party on Sunset Strip with a bunch of hippies," Mel joked.
Tay scowled at her and went back to his computer.
"Well this one might be more your speed," Jason chuckled. "Does Maxim ring a bell?"
Mel's blood ran cold. "Uh, I wasn't aware you knew anything about that..."
It was true. There was a Maxim party being held in New York the next week. They were all going to be there. And now it looked like Jason was joining in the fun, too.
"You know, this is the second party you've conveniently neglected to tell me about. I'm beginning to think you
don't want me around."
"Why wouldn't I want you around? That's absurd."
"I'm joking, don't take it to heart."
"I know, I just--"
"Anyway, I wanted to let you know I would be there to support you, so that I don't blindside you like I did the last one."
"Support me? I'm flattered but this is hardly MY party. It's just a party..."
"Any party you're attending is your party."
Mel felt herself blush for a moment and quickly fought to make it disappear. "Well, I appreciate it. And
I'll be glad to see you there."
"Not as glad as I'll be."
--------------------------------------------------------------
JASON
Jason glanced at his date, Dana, and smiled as he escorted her into the club that the Maxim party was being held in. She was a pretty girl. Tall, blonde. A little younger than him. He didn't know her terribly well, she was a costume assistant on the movie he was currently filming and she was new to the industry and a little
shy, so he thought he'd do a good deed and bring her to the party that night. If things went well, he might take her to dinner sometime.
Who was he kidding? He knew he only had eyes for one woman. The one woman he couldn't have. The one
woman he tortured himself over day after day, going to sleep every night and praying to wake up to the day that he'd dreamed this entire thing and she would be in bed beside him, her beautiful face happy to see him.
That day would never come and he knew it.
So he dealt with it a day at a time, as best as he could. The answer was obvious to any lovesick fool--stay away from her. Out of sight, out of mind. If he really wanted to get over her, that would be the way to do it. But deep down, in some morbidly sadistic part of his brain, or even his heart, he couldn't stay away and he didn't want to get over her. He was addicted to her. Addicted to the way she made him feel. He'd never loved anyone like her before. He was fairly certain he didn't want to love anyone else.
It didn't take long to spot Mel once inside the club. From across the room, he watched her pose for pictures
with Nikki and Kate, her dress taking his breath away. He swore every time he saw her, her dresses only got shorter and shorter and he had to laugh to himself at the concept of Taylor allowing her to leave the house in half the stuff she dressed in. Not that she generally showed a lot of skin. It was just a known fact that the woman couldn't wear a raggedy housecoat without melting the heart of every man she came in contact with. Or maybe he was just biased. He didn't know and he didn't care. The fact of the matter was, she now stood next to Taylor, uptight as he was known to be, and smiled for the camera in a tiny, clingy, dark purple dress
with one capped sleeve and one strap cinched with a jeweled accessory. His eyes followed her legs down to the black open-toed stilettos she wore on her feet that strapped around her ankles.
His mind began to wander to the last time her legs were wrapped around his neck in a pair of heels like that when Dana gently touched his arm. "Hey, are you okay?"
Shaking himself out of his trance, the modern pop music seemingly growing louder through the speakers, he smiled at her. "Yeah, I'm great. You wanna get a drink?"
Heading with her to the bar, he couldn't help but glance across the club one more time at Mel and this time her eyes met his. The look on her face when her eyes landed on Dana made Jason instantly regret bringing her along. Something in his gut told him to come stag, just as he always did to these things, and as much as he loved Mel, he also hated playing third wheel to hers and Taylor's little fairy tale love affair. At some point in his life he was going to have to make the effort to move on, futile as it seemed to be.
Mel was devastated. It was written all over her face. His heart broke at the sight, but at the same time, what
could he do? She couldn't marry both of them--pretentious as the thought may have been that she'd ever want to marry him. But still. She couldn't have them both. She'd made her decision and now she would have to deal with the future. He knew she'd had feelings for him before. And if she still harbored any at all, he would never know. But he knew shock when he saw it and he was currently witnessing it from across the room. He just didn't like it being at his expense.
For the next hour, he watched her work the room. He watched her smile and laugh as Taylor clung to her like a proud fiancée should. He watched her talk and drink and pose for pictures. He watched her eyes dart into his with every move she made. What was this about? Why was she so distant?
Another half an hour went by and Jason finally spied Mel climbing the stairs to the second level where the
restrooms were located. Alone. His eyes immediately darted around the room and found Taylor with his back turned, talking with Isaac and another couple. He took this opportunity to excuse himself from Dana, siting a
restroom break, and casually made his way up the stairs.
The second level was relatively quiet. A few people milled around, but not too many. The party was jumping
downstairs and people apparently came upstairs to be heard in whatever important conversation they decided they needed to have in the middle of a Maxim rager.
Mel was nowhere to be found up there and he decided she must have been in the restroom, so he leaned against the wall of the alcove that led to them and waited for her. He didn't wait long and she finally emerged, snapping her clutch together and looking up, startled, with no way to escape him. "You know, we gotta stop meeting like this, all surprising each other and shit," Jason said to her.
"Um, hi. Are, uh, are you having fun?"
"I'd be having more fun if you weren't avoiding me."
"I'm not avoiding you..."
"I haven't laid eyes on you in weeks and now you're avoiding me like the plague. What gives? Why didn't you tell me not to come if you didn't want to see me?"
"I do want to see you."
"Then what's the problem? Too wrapped up in your fiancée or your new pinup career to have time for your friends anymore? Sounds a lot like someone else we know."
"Jason," she said, her voice firming. "That's not fair. And completely uncalled for."
"Then what is it?"
"I don't know. I just--I didn't want to intrude on your date."
Jason scoffed. "Intrude on my--is that what your problem is?"
"I mean, I don't know if I'd consider it a problem, per se...I just...I don't know..."
"You're feeling a little possessive, aren't you?"
"Maybe 'possessive' is a strong word, I just--I'm happy for you, that you brought a date--"
"Are you?"
Mel looked up into his eyes. "Don't make this difficult," she said quietly. "We're friends."
"That sounds like self-assurance."
"That sounds like you want it to be self-assurance."
"Is it?"
Mel sighed and her eyes darted around on the ground, apparently having a difficult time looking him the eye. "I guess--I guess maybe I'm just so used to seeing you alone that--I mean I knew this time would come eventually, that you would find someone, I just--I guess I just never prepared myself for when it actually happened. I'm just so used to you being--"
"Yours?"
"Um, well--I wasn't gonna say--"
"Mel, you know you'll always be my number one. I'd drop my entire life for you at a second's notice."
"Jason--"
"It isn't serious, you know. Me and her. Her name is Dana, by the way. I mean, she's a nice girl and
all, but she's not really my type."
"You never know."
He smiled at her amused. "Oh, you're trying to hook me up now?"
Her face was still serious. "I'm trying to make it okay. I'm--I know how I feel isn't fair to you, I just--you're my best friend and I'm naturally gonna be judgmental of any woman you bring around."
"And that's all it is?"
"Why are you doing this?"
"I'm sorry."
"I want to support you, Jason. Just like you support me. And you're right, I am a little possessive. You were mine first, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. That underlying jealousy will always be there, that feeling that she'll never be good enough for you will always be there. But the truth is I wasn't good enough for you, either, so really, who am I to judge?"
"Mel, don't say that--"
"I'm serious. I was unfair to you, you can't deny it. You just can't."
"You never said or did anything to lead me on or make me believe--you were always clear with your intentions and how you felt. How I felt then--how I feel now--that's all me. You can't blame yourself for that. That's all on me. I want--and I'm trying--to be the best friend I can be to you. You need me. And I need you. And the last thing I want to do is ruin anything with you."
"But you have to live your life."
"That's absolutely right. I do. And I am. Just taking it a day at a time."
"So do you like her?"
Jason shrugged. "She's okay, I guess."
"So then why did you bring her along?"
"Because I knew you would look like that and he would be here to reap all the benefits."
Mel blushed and tucked her hair behind her ear. "So then you're sleeping with her. I mean, not like your
personal life is any of my business--"
"No," he said, winking at her. "I'm not sleeping with her."
"But you will..."
He shook his head. "Highly doubtful."
"She's pretty."
"She is. So what?"
"I'd do her."
Jason could stop himself from throwing his head back and laughing. "Wow! If this is you trying to be okay with it, you are going above and beyond the call of duty."
"I'm just saying..."
He grew serious once again. "Mel, I'm not gonna sleep with her. The truth is, I haven't--"
She put her hand up to stop him. "You don't need to elaborate."
"--I haven't slept with anyone else since you."
Mel shook her head in denial. "Jason..."
"I told you in the beginning I'm not that kind of guy. I don't sleep around."
"Well, I mean--even if you did, what goes on in your personal life is none of my business. You could--you could if you wanted to, it wouldn't mean anything to me."
"Yes it would. You know it would. It would kill you the way it kills me."
She looked up into his eyes, her expression pained. He wanted to take back every single thing he'd just said. He wanted to rewind and never follow her up these stairs, just to never have to see that expression on her face. "You have to stop saying these things to me. Why do you keep telling me these things?"
"Because you're the only person I CAN tell. It's sick and it's twisted, I know, but you're literally the only one person I can open up and spill my guts to. And if I have to spill my guts ABOUT you TO you, then so be it. You know I don't hide anything from you."
"And I'm supposed to just listen and nod and keep repeating to you that I'm sorry but I'm marrying someone
else."
"Yeah."
"And that's the way you like things between us."
"I'll take you any way I can have you."
"Tell me not to marry him."
Jason's heart leapt out of his chest. This couldn't be happening. "What?"
"Tell me not to marry him. Make me stay. Make me leave this club with you right now and never look back."
He couldn't breathe. He was completely speechless. What the hell was happening right now? Had she gone
insane? Was this it? Was this his chance?
And then he choked. "I--I can't--"
"You can't."
"I can't." What? What the fuck was he saying? Of course he could!
Except he knew the truth.
"Why?"
"Because. You love him. You'll never look at me the way you look at him. I can't compete with that. I could offer you the entire world, sun, moon, and stars and all, and you still wouldn't look at me the way you look at him. I can't convince you to--I shouldn't have come tonight."
Mel studied his face hard. "I don't really know what to say anymore, Jason. I don't like seeing you this way
and I don't know how to help you. Every time you open your mouth, I feel like a complete asshole. I know you keep saying it's all you, but it doesn't help the way it makes me feel. I don't like feeling like I'm a burden on you. And I truly believe that I am."
"How do I convince you otherwise?"
"Make a choice," she said matter-of-factly. "I mean, I hate to be so harsh about it. And I damn sure don't want to lose you. But you're either my friend or you're...this. You can't be both. You have to decide which one is more important. But I can't have any more of this conversation right here happening. It's heart-wrenching for both of us. You know it is."
Mel searched his eyes for a response but he couldn't give her one. He was rendered completely speechless. She was absolutely right. Where did he go from here?
Not garnering a response from him, Mel gave him one last look before she descended the stairs. This may have been, single-handedly, one of the worst nights of his life.
----------------------------------------------
MEL
Mel rolled over in the dark and spooned him, tucking her arm underneath his and letting her fingers lightly graze his chest. She let one of her fingers trace some of the chest hair that peppered him between his breasts and she smiled, taking in the clean scent of soap and aftershave. Kissing his shoulder lightly, his skin felt
different, but she was also half-asleep so pretty much everything felt different at this point.
Sliding her arm out from underneath his, she let her hand graze his arm and back over his chest. His large arm, his strong, muscular chest, his skin so warm against hers...
Jason turned over in response to her and Mel nearly had a heart attack. Looking at him in shock, she darted away from him across the bed, unable to get away fast enough.
Mel woke up when she found herself on the floor, rubbing her head from the hit she took on the corner of her
nightstand. She rubbed the stinging, throbbing knot as Taylor stirred in the bed above her and turned on his own beside lamp. "Mel?" he said, his voice groggy with sleep. "What the hell are you doing?"
"Camping out, what does it look like?" She grimaced, standing herself off the floor and climbing back in the
bed.
He looked over at her, one eye open, trying to shut out the shock of the light. "Did you fall out of bed?"
"Yeah, so sue me."
"How did you manage that?"
"Tay, I don't know," she said annoyed, her head still stinging. "Maybe I was on the edge of the bed or something, I don't know." The one thing she knew was, she sure as hell wasn't going to say a word about the dream she'd just had.
"Come here," he said, pulling her to the middle of the bed and kissing the top her head. He turned off the lamp and tucked them both back under the covers. "You stay right here with me so that doesn't happen again. I'll keep you safe." Within seconds he was sound asleep.
MEL
Sunday.
Mel loved Sundays. Sunday was the one day of the week where Mel had space in her brain to think. Sunday got the house clean, the laundry done, and quality time with Taylor. Sundays were spent in pajamas, watching movies, and munching on crap.
This particular Sunday felt like work.
Mel and Tay both sat in the living room on opposite sofas, both with their feet propped on the same coffee table. They both sported their glasses and they both had their laptops in their laps, hard at work on their guest list for the wedding. Mel finally had to threaten Tay with the bodily harm of an instrument from the music room if he didn't buckle down and help her work on it. So here they sat, conducting the listing of guests as if it were a business meeting. Oddly enough, this was their norm.
"Wow, this is gonna end up being a bigger wedding than I thought," Tay said, shaking his head at his computer
screen. "I'm already up to 50 people and I'm still in my family!"
"Are you doing it by individuals or by families?"
He looked up at her in alarm. "Individuals?"
Mel shook her head as he feverishly went back to typing.
Meanwhile, Mel was growing increasingly frustrated with her own list. The plan had been for each of them to list who they wanted to invite and then compile their lists together. The problem was, Mel's list was next to nothing. She began to draw a frustrating blank when, as if reading her mind, Tay spoke up. "So how long
is your list getting over there?"
Mel looked up at him and winced. "Um, seven?"
Tay gaped at her. "Seven? You're kidding."
She shook her head. "My parents, the girls in the office, and Jason."
"Mel. That can't possibly be it."
"I don't really have anybody. I mean, I have an uncle and a couple of cousins, but I haven't talked to any of them since I married John. My uncle thought John was a putz and kinda caused a scene at the wedding. I'm not really close to them. And my mom doesn't have any siblings. My grandparents are all gone. And...that's it."
"I know I'm going out on a limb here, but have you considered Drew?"
She glowered at him. "Are you kidding?"
He raised his hands in defense. "Okay. Okay."
"I mean, I guess I could invite Bob Sheldon and his wife. And Willie from Irving Plaza. You think they'd wanna
come all the way to Texas just to watch me get married?"
"If they're important to you I don't see why they wouldn't."
"Well then that puts my grand total up to a whopping nine. Tay, the truth is, all the people who are important to me are important to you, too. They're probably all already on your list. This was a dumb idea. It's gonna be one hell of a lopsided wedding, I'll tell you that."
"See, that's why I don't believe in having a bride's side and a groom's side. I mean, I get the point, but it's kinda stupid. Don't go in there divided. We're creating a union. Why have a side? Why not everyone just sit together and unite our families as we unite ourselves? Doesn't that make more sense?"
Mel smiled at him, touched by his words. "I love you," she said softly.
He grinned at her, his eyes bright. "How much would you love me if I told you I wanted to handle the
invitations?"
She narrowed her eyes and sucked in a breath. "Now you're just turning me on."
Tay laughed and their moment was quickly over at the sound of Mel's phone ringing. She couldn't help but be a little surprised to see that it was Jason calling. She hadn't heard from him in weeks! "Well, surprise, surprise," she answered.
He chuckled on the other end. "Hey, gorgeous. What are you up to?"
"Tay and I are actually sitting here going over the guest list."
"When are you gonna ask me to be your maid of honor?"
"I don't know, what's your dress size?"
Jason laughed. "Not gonna happen."
"I'm sorry, then. Job requires a dress. Guess you're just not maid of honor material."
"Guess I'm not. So, listen, I was invited to a party..."
"Last time a man started a conversation with that I ended up at a weird party on Sunset Strip with a bunch of hippies," Mel joked.
Tay scowled at her and went back to his computer.
"Well this one might be more your speed," Jason chuckled. "Does Maxim ring a bell?"
Mel's blood ran cold. "Uh, I wasn't aware you knew anything about that..."
It was true. There was a Maxim party being held in New York the next week. They were all going to be there. And now it looked like Jason was joining in the fun, too.
"You know, this is the second party you've conveniently neglected to tell me about. I'm beginning to think you
don't want me around."
"Why wouldn't I want you around? That's absurd."
"I'm joking, don't take it to heart."
"I know, I just--"
"Anyway, I wanted to let you know I would be there to support you, so that I don't blindside you like I did the last one."
"Support me? I'm flattered but this is hardly MY party. It's just a party..."
"Any party you're attending is your party."
Mel felt herself blush for a moment and quickly fought to make it disappear. "Well, I appreciate it. And
I'll be glad to see you there."
"Not as glad as I'll be."
--------------------------------------------------------------
JASON
Jason glanced at his date, Dana, and smiled as he escorted her into the club that the Maxim party was being held in. She was a pretty girl. Tall, blonde. A little younger than him. He didn't know her terribly well, she was a costume assistant on the movie he was currently filming and she was new to the industry and a little
shy, so he thought he'd do a good deed and bring her to the party that night. If things went well, he might take her to dinner sometime.
Who was he kidding? He knew he only had eyes for one woman. The one woman he couldn't have. The one
woman he tortured himself over day after day, going to sleep every night and praying to wake up to the day that he'd dreamed this entire thing and she would be in bed beside him, her beautiful face happy to see him.
That day would never come and he knew it.
So he dealt with it a day at a time, as best as he could. The answer was obvious to any lovesick fool--stay away from her. Out of sight, out of mind. If he really wanted to get over her, that would be the way to do it. But deep down, in some morbidly sadistic part of his brain, or even his heart, he couldn't stay away and he didn't want to get over her. He was addicted to her. Addicted to the way she made him feel. He'd never loved anyone like her before. He was fairly certain he didn't want to love anyone else.
It didn't take long to spot Mel once inside the club. From across the room, he watched her pose for pictures
with Nikki and Kate, her dress taking his breath away. He swore every time he saw her, her dresses only got shorter and shorter and he had to laugh to himself at the concept of Taylor allowing her to leave the house in half the stuff she dressed in. Not that she generally showed a lot of skin. It was just a known fact that the woman couldn't wear a raggedy housecoat without melting the heart of every man she came in contact with. Or maybe he was just biased. He didn't know and he didn't care. The fact of the matter was, she now stood next to Taylor, uptight as he was known to be, and smiled for the camera in a tiny, clingy, dark purple dress
with one capped sleeve and one strap cinched with a jeweled accessory. His eyes followed her legs down to the black open-toed stilettos she wore on her feet that strapped around her ankles.
His mind began to wander to the last time her legs were wrapped around his neck in a pair of heels like that when Dana gently touched his arm. "Hey, are you okay?"
Shaking himself out of his trance, the modern pop music seemingly growing louder through the speakers, he smiled at her. "Yeah, I'm great. You wanna get a drink?"
Heading with her to the bar, he couldn't help but glance across the club one more time at Mel and this time her eyes met his. The look on her face when her eyes landed on Dana made Jason instantly regret bringing her along. Something in his gut told him to come stag, just as he always did to these things, and as much as he loved Mel, he also hated playing third wheel to hers and Taylor's little fairy tale love affair. At some point in his life he was going to have to make the effort to move on, futile as it seemed to be.
Mel was devastated. It was written all over her face. His heart broke at the sight, but at the same time, what
could he do? She couldn't marry both of them--pretentious as the thought may have been that she'd ever want to marry him. But still. She couldn't have them both. She'd made her decision and now she would have to deal with the future. He knew she'd had feelings for him before. And if she still harbored any at all, he would never know. But he knew shock when he saw it and he was currently witnessing it from across the room. He just didn't like it being at his expense.
For the next hour, he watched her work the room. He watched her smile and laugh as Taylor clung to her like a proud fiancée should. He watched her talk and drink and pose for pictures. He watched her eyes dart into his with every move she made. What was this about? Why was she so distant?
Another half an hour went by and Jason finally spied Mel climbing the stairs to the second level where the
restrooms were located. Alone. His eyes immediately darted around the room and found Taylor with his back turned, talking with Isaac and another couple. He took this opportunity to excuse himself from Dana, siting a
restroom break, and casually made his way up the stairs.
The second level was relatively quiet. A few people milled around, but not too many. The party was jumping
downstairs and people apparently came upstairs to be heard in whatever important conversation they decided they needed to have in the middle of a Maxim rager.
Mel was nowhere to be found up there and he decided she must have been in the restroom, so he leaned against the wall of the alcove that led to them and waited for her. He didn't wait long and she finally emerged, snapping her clutch together and looking up, startled, with no way to escape him. "You know, we gotta stop meeting like this, all surprising each other and shit," Jason said to her.
"Um, hi. Are, uh, are you having fun?"
"I'd be having more fun if you weren't avoiding me."
"I'm not avoiding you..."
"I haven't laid eyes on you in weeks and now you're avoiding me like the plague. What gives? Why didn't you tell me not to come if you didn't want to see me?"
"I do want to see you."
"Then what's the problem? Too wrapped up in your fiancée or your new pinup career to have time for your friends anymore? Sounds a lot like someone else we know."
"Jason," she said, her voice firming. "That's not fair. And completely uncalled for."
"Then what is it?"
"I don't know. I just--I didn't want to intrude on your date."
Jason scoffed. "Intrude on my--is that what your problem is?"
"I mean, I don't know if I'd consider it a problem, per se...I just...I don't know..."
"You're feeling a little possessive, aren't you?"
"Maybe 'possessive' is a strong word, I just--I'm happy for you, that you brought a date--"
"Are you?"
Mel looked up into his eyes. "Don't make this difficult," she said quietly. "We're friends."
"That sounds like self-assurance."
"That sounds like you want it to be self-assurance."
"Is it?"
Mel sighed and her eyes darted around on the ground, apparently having a difficult time looking him the eye. "I guess--I guess maybe I'm just so used to seeing you alone that--I mean I knew this time would come eventually, that you would find someone, I just--I guess I just never prepared myself for when it actually happened. I'm just so used to you being--"
"Yours?"
"Um, well--I wasn't gonna say--"
"Mel, you know you'll always be my number one. I'd drop my entire life for you at a second's notice."
"Jason--"
"It isn't serious, you know. Me and her. Her name is Dana, by the way. I mean, she's a nice girl and
all, but she's not really my type."
"You never know."
He smiled at her amused. "Oh, you're trying to hook me up now?"
Her face was still serious. "I'm trying to make it okay. I'm--I know how I feel isn't fair to you, I just--you're my best friend and I'm naturally gonna be judgmental of any woman you bring around."
"And that's all it is?"
"Why are you doing this?"
"I'm sorry."
"I want to support you, Jason. Just like you support me. And you're right, I am a little possessive. You were mine first, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. That underlying jealousy will always be there, that feeling that she'll never be good enough for you will always be there. But the truth is I wasn't good enough for you, either, so really, who am I to judge?"
"Mel, don't say that--"
"I'm serious. I was unfair to you, you can't deny it. You just can't."
"You never said or did anything to lead me on or make me believe--you were always clear with your intentions and how you felt. How I felt then--how I feel now--that's all me. You can't blame yourself for that. That's all on me. I want--and I'm trying--to be the best friend I can be to you. You need me. And I need you. And the last thing I want to do is ruin anything with you."
"But you have to live your life."
"That's absolutely right. I do. And I am. Just taking it a day at a time."
"So do you like her?"
Jason shrugged. "She's okay, I guess."
"So then why did you bring her along?"
"Because I knew you would look like that and he would be here to reap all the benefits."
Mel blushed and tucked her hair behind her ear. "So then you're sleeping with her. I mean, not like your
personal life is any of my business--"
"No," he said, winking at her. "I'm not sleeping with her."
"But you will..."
He shook his head. "Highly doubtful."
"She's pretty."
"She is. So what?"
"I'd do her."
Jason could stop himself from throwing his head back and laughing. "Wow! If this is you trying to be okay with it, you are going above and beyond the call of duty."
"I'm just saying..."
He grew serious once again. "Mel, I'm not gonna sleep with her. The truth is, I haven't--"
She put her hand up to stop him. "You don't need to elaborate."
"--I haven't slept with anyone else since you."
Mel shook her head in denial. "Jason..."
"I told you in the beginning I'm not that kind of guy. I don't sleep around."
"Well, I mean--even if you did, what goes on in your personal life is none of my business. You could--you could if you wanted to, it wouldn't mean anything to me."
"Yes it would. You know it would. It would kill you the way it kills me."
She looked up into his eyes, her expression pained. He wanted to take back every single thing he'd just said. He wanted to rewind and never follow her up these stairs, just to never have to see that expression on her face. "You have to stop saying these things to me. Why do you keep telling me these things?"
"Because you're the only person I CAN tell. It's sick and it's twisted, I know, but you're literally the only one person I can open up and spill my guts to. And if I have to spill my guts ABOUT you TO you, then so be it. You know I don't hide anything from you."
"And I'm supposed to just listen and nod and keep repeating to you that I'm sorry but I'm marrying someone
else."
"Yeah."
"And that's the way you like things between us."
"I'll take you any way I can have you."
"Tell me not to marry him."
Jason's heart leapt out of his chest. This couldn't be happening. "What?"
"Tell me not to marry him. Make me stay. Make me leave this club with you right now and never look back."
He couldn't breathe. He was completely speechless. What the hell was happening right now? Had she gone
insane? Was this it? Was this his chance?
And then he choked. "I--I can't--"
"You can't."
"I can't." What? What the fuck was he saying? Of course he could!
Except he knew the truth.
"Why?"
"Because. You love him. You'll never look at me the way you look at him. I can't compete with that. I could offer you the entire world, sun, moon, and stars and all, and you still wouldn't look at me the way you look at him. I can't convince you to--I shouldn't have come tonight."
Mel studied his face hard. "I don't really know what to say anymore, Jason. I don't like seeing you this way
and I don't know how to help you. Every time you open your mouth, I feel like a complete asshole. I know you keep saying it's all you, but it doesn't help the way it makes me feel. I don't like feeling like I'm a burden on you. And I truly believe that I am."
"How do I convince you otherwise?"
"Make a choice," she said matter-of-factly. "I mean, I hate to be so harsh about it. And I damn sure don't want to lose you. But you're either my friend or you're...this. You can't be both. You have to decide which one is more important. But I can't have any more of this conversation right here happening. It's heart-wrenching for both of us. You know it is."
Mel searched his eyes for a response but he couldn't give her one. He was rendered completely speechless. She was absolutely right. Where did he go from here?
Not garnering a response from him, Mel gave him one last look before she descended the stairs. This may have been, single-handedly, one of the worst nights of his life.
----------------------------------------------
MEL
Mel rolled over in the dark and spooned him, tucking her arm underneath his and letting her fingers lightly graze his chest. She let one of her fingers trace some of the chest hair that peppered him between his breasts and she smiled, taking in the clean scent of soap and aftershave. Kissing his shoulder lightly, his skin felt
different, but she was also half-asleep so pretty much everything felt different at this point.
Sliding her arm out from underneath his, she let her hand graze his arm and back over his chest. His large arm, his strong, muscular chest, his skin so warm against hers...
Jason turned over in response to her and Mel nearly had a heart attack. Looking at him in shock, she darted away from him across the bed, unable to get away fast enough.
Mel woke up when she found herself on the floor, rubbing her head from the hit she took on the corner of her
nightstand. She rubbed the stinging, throbbing knot as Taylor stirred in the bed above her and turned on his own beside lamp. "Mel?" he said, his voice groggy with sleep. "What the hell are you doing?"
"Camping out, what does it look like?" She grimaced, standing herself off the floor and climbing back in the
bed.
He looked over at her, one eye open, trying to shut out the shock of the light. "Did you fall out of bed?"
"Yeah, so sue me."
"How did you manage that?"
"Tay, I don't know," she said annoyed, her head still stinging. "Maybe I was on the edge of the bed or something, I don't know." The one thing she knew was, she sure as hell wasn't going to say a word about the dream she'd just had.
"Come here," he said, pulling her to the middle of the bed and kissing the top her head. He turned off the lamp and tucked them both back under the covers. "You stay right here with me so that doesn't happen again. I'll keep you safe." Within seconds he was sound asleep.